My Adventures in Writing

Missing Being Creative

aurae — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 01:49:02 +0000

I haven’t written an article or a creative story in a long time. I guess I’ve moved into my healthcare career, where I spend a majority of my time and energy. I do like my career but sometimes I feel like I’m missing something. I miss being creative. Yet, even when I have the time, I can’t seem to motivate myself to be creative. For example, this weekend I had some free time when I could have written an article or wrote a story or did some kind of creative writing. But I couldn’t seem to get motivated to do it. I did write a journal article and I did write this blog entry, but that’s it. Maybe it takes getting used to. Maybe since it’s been so long, I’m out of practice. I hope to write again, and spill out my heart and mind onto paper. I do know I will write again, and it will feel like it was just yesterday. I anticipate the day!

Here’s a picture from beautiful Maui, where my creative nature was ready to explode! If only I’d had more time. Aloha!

Why Isn’t It This Way?

aurae — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 04:53:29 +0000

We arrived at the church 15 minutes early. The parking lot was packed already. The parking attendants signaled us to the back lot. It took several minutes before we could park. Then we started our hike to the church’s auditorium. There were people of all ages excitedly making their way to the front doors. Once in the front doors, we were met with a mass of people trying to find their way to the auditorium doors. Ushers took their tickets before allowing entry. We turned to head up the stairs to the balcony. Even though we had arrived early, the ground floor of the auditorium was just about full. All the good seats were taken. We handed our ticket to the ushers and climbed the stairs. We spotted an open section of a pew with direct vision of the main stage. We headed towards it, asking the man sitting at the end of the pew if it was open. His response was yes but when we were almost seated, the woman on the other end said the room was being saved for four people. A bit discouraged we went back to scout out our seats. Then, we spotted a couple trying to get our attention, pointing at the small open space next to them - enough room for the two of us. We thanked them and settled in. The audience was alive with excitement and anticipation. We still had ten minutes until the event began. As I sat taken in the sights and sounds, I couldn’t help but wonder why it wasn’t like this every Sunday?

We weren’t here tonight for church but rather to see a comedian. Although the comedian was a Christian, and gave a good message, I kept asking, why isn’t it this way all the time? Why don’t we arrive 15 minutes early for church, packing the parking lots, excitedly finding the best seats, saving the best for our friends and family? I guess to a certain extent we do act in this manner. But maybe we taken it for granted that every Sunday we have the opportunity to hear something that may just change our lives?

As the show went on that night, I noticed that each person was laughing and engaged. I can’t say this is the case for every church service on Sundays. Maybe we try our hardest to stay engaged but I do believe that many of us are distracted during church, thinking of our shopping lists, errands to run, how we look or all the other plans flying around in our minds. But last night, we were all focused on the comedian, awaiting each joke and wondering where he was going next. How often do we do this at church, focused on the sermon and wondering where the sermon would go next.

I’m not sure what the answer is but I do hope we stop to think of each Sunday as a new opportunity, a chance to see God’s word in motion, sculpting and changing our lives. I do hope we will be as engaged as possible, leaving our distractions at the door. I hope we can see each Sunday like this comedy night, as something special, something to look forward to and anticipate.

Changes Coming Soon

aurae — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 03:29:23 +0000

Changes to the website and blog are coming soon! I am ready to update things, getting ready to move into a new chapter of writing and editing. I hope you follow along and enjoy! Please send me any comments or suggestions. I hope to get to more writing soon. I am overdue!

It’s a Busy Life

aurae — Fri, 20 May 2011 04:25:37 +0000

It’s been awhile since I’ve written. It’s been awhile since I’ve done anything very creative. I can tell that I am missing that part of me. I have been so busy with work, school and life. I’m taking 4 classes right now that are very demanding. Sometimes I question why. But I know that I’ve been given this opportunity for a reason. I know that my time right now is a sacrifice and that soon I will be able to have a full life again. I do like what I’m learning. I just wish I had more time to learn it.

Christmastime and Mangers

aurae — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 05:35:12 +0000

I love manger scenes. Today I thought of the one I remember growing up, with Jesus, Mary and Joseph in a wooden structure surrounded by livestock. Ours was made of real wood. I remember that we put moss in it to look like hay. You may think that’s odd but we put moss on lots of things, and we had plenty of it, growing up in the foothills of the Cascades! I remember tucking the moss around the animals and Baby Jesus.

That’s a special memory for me because I didn’t grow up attending church or knowing anything about God. God, Jesus and church just weren’t a part of my life as a child. About the only times I set foot in a church were with my cousin and aunt and uncle. My first vivid memory of a church is the one where we had my grandma’s memorial service when I was 13. I’m sure I had been in many church before that but singing “Amazing Grace” and wonder why my grandma had to leave this Earth is a glaring memory, and being in a big church.

But thinking about the manger we had, made me wonder why we only bring mangers out at Christmas. I guess it’s because that’s the only time we think of Jesus as a little baby. It’s a wonderful scene though with everyone looking so compassionate and caring at the miracle of Jesus’ birth.

I will always remember our little manger scene at Christmas and placing the moss around the little baby, who I did not know at that time would be my Savior and best friend.

Busy Life, Hasn’t Slowed Down

aurae — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 02:57:36 +0000

Well, I thought that after graduating life would slow down. I was wrong. It just seems that any free time is filled. Then, there are the times when after being busy I just want to do nothing. It’s funny because during those times, I tend to feel guilty or lazy. I am so used to being constantly busy that any free time feels like I’m wasting it. I hope it gets better. I do love spending my time at home. But then again that can be a problem because then I don’t want to leave. Our home is comfortable and feels so nice after two years of spending every other weekend away.

I did get away though to the coast for some relaxation. I hope to write about my time at the Sylvia Beach Hotel very soon with pictures.

God’s Glory

aurae — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 21:19:46 +0000

Yesterday as I drove to work I was presented with the amazing beauty of our world. It was so beautiful and picturesque that a photograph would not have done it justice. I come across some pretty scenes on my drive to work through Oregon’s bountiful Willamette Valley. I am blessed with this drive, most days. People cringe when they hear about my 45 minute commute but they don’t know the beauty and serenity that it holds. Maybe that’s my little secret.

So, yesterday morning it was clear and cool, with just a hint of autumn in the air. It was just enough hint to make you think autumn could be near but not clear enough to forget that it is still August and summer. As I drove north near Lewisburg, I looked to my right only to see the most clear shot of Mt. Jefferson I had seen all summer. The peak stood towering high above the mountains below and looked as if it had been outlined with a black marker. Each jagged point was individually visible, and all from just a few glances while driving. It was mesmerizing and I wished I had more time to stop and take in the view.

Because of the beauty I was seeing and the fact that I kept glancing to the right, I took the next road to head directly east. I just had to see more. As I turned to face the rising sun, I was not only faced with the clear picture of Mt. Jefferson but a distant glimpse of Mt. Hood and two of the Three Sisters. What a glorious sight! This just made my morning very special and I smiled. There was no way I could capture this moment in photo or describe it to anyone and I realized then that this was a special moment for me, made by God. He sure is amazing and breath-taking. But I’m not done yet.

The day before I had seen one hot air balloon rising above Albany and that gave me a smile. So, as I turned to face east, I looked more to the south, only to see 6 or 7 hot air balloons rising in the sky. Wow! That was an amazing picture. I could not imagine the sights those people on the balloons were seeing. What a beautiful late summer morning! Thank you to my amazing God!

The Passing of Loved Ones

aurae — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 03:49:50 +0000

Yesterday was the 2nd anniversary of the passing of my father-in-law. Sometimes it feels like just yesterday, when we were all gathered in that hospital room watching him fade away but other times it feels like a distant memory. Sometimes it feels like he’s gone on a long vacation yet to return. But we know his fate and know he’s really physically gone. Yet, his legacy live on - he left us an example of how a human being should live - humbly, caring for others more than himself, helping above and beyond, faithful in everything he did, content and thankful for everything he had and enjoying the wonderful life God had given him.

I was reminded of his absence from several messages I received yesterday expressing words of comfort for our loss. I say our loss but I don’t always feel it’s right to say I’m a part of “our” when I only knew him for 3 years. But it is my loss because a part of my husband died 2 short years ago.

I don’t know what to say to my family so I say nothing. I just don’t think there are words to express my feelings or make them feel better. I wish someone would give me the perfect book on how to make someone feel better who is missing a loved one who has passed away. What do I say? How do I act? I don’t want to ignore their feelings or act like it’s nothing. I know they are feeling something very deep, very personal and very sad. It’s something I know little about and it scares me.

Other than my father-in-law, the closest person to me that I have experienced passing away was my grandmother but I was 13. I remember crying and singing “Amazing Grace” at her memorial, and then driving to Newport to spread her ashes in the ocean. I remember missing her and how sad my mom was. But I don’t think I miss her everyday like I know my husband misses his father. That’s what scares me; the thought of my heart breaking and aching if someone close to me should die. I can’t imagine my life without my mom - who would I talk to when I was upset or needed advice? What if my sister died - who would I do silly things with and laugh about childhood memories with? I don’t even want to talk about losing my husband…

Life is so precious. Relationships are treasures. I hope and pray that when we get to heaven those relationships we’ve made here are something we can continue for eternity.

How Time Flies!

aurae — Sat, 15 May 2010 05:46:01 +0000

Time has begun to fly by more quickly. Nice, warm spring weather tends to make that happen for some reason. Why can’t the cold, rainy winters go that fast? It’s hard to believe this is my second to last weekend spent in Portland. I just started my last MHA class with this weekend and one in June left. After that, I have my presentation weekend in July and then graduation in August. Wow! I’m almost done. Almost done and already looking to the next thing that is. I tend to what my ducks in a row or however that goes about the future. I’m a planner. I know there is a larger plan for me out there but I can’t help but want to help plan out my life. Maybe it will align with what God has in store for me and I’m sure hopeful of it. I know that God has even bigger things in store if I’m just patient.

So, all my hard work is about to pay off and it feels good. My load is lighter and I can begin to think of others things to fill my time, like all of those projects on the backburner - what did I tell you, I’m a planner.

Mt Hood Saves the Day

aurae — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 06:44:54 +0000

So, I’m back to my normal routine of driving to the Portland area for my graduate school classes. The drive from Salem to Hillsboro isn’t too bad most days, except that I think A LOT of people leave work early on Friday. Why is that really? To get a jump on the weekend? Why don’t we leave early on Monday? Or better yet, get to work an hour or two later on Monday? Maybe I should start a new trend.
But anyway, my drives have become routine again after a very long break from classes this past fall and winter. I got rather used to spending my free time at home and to be honest, some of it was spent being just plain lazy. The other time, I spent ripping out 40 year old flooring (some of it looked that old anyway) and putting in new laminate wood flooring and vinyl tile. It was a project and at times, more difficult than actual school work. But it was time well spent with my husband.
Getting back to my routine drive, I’ve found a new route, or rather am revisiting an old route. I now drive through Newberg, up over a steep hill, winding up and over it and then down to Hillsboro. It’s very windy and slow but then the other route requires slowing to an almost complete stop when traveling through three small towns. It’s a toss up but makes more sense lately to drive the revisited route.

Today as I climbed the steep, windy hill, I admired the view of the valley below. Sometimes I take for granted or actually feel punished to have to drive so far. But in reality, if I stop to take in what I am traveling through, it’s worth it. Springtime is especially eye-catching, as I pass lambs, calves, daffodils, and flowering trees everywhere. Not having to keep the windshield wipers on constantly is a blessing.
Today I realized how beautiful the area is when I turned a corner to find a towering, white Mt. Hood in front of me. Portlanders really are lucky to have such a magnificent mountain right out their backdoor, not to mention Mt. St. Helens and Mt. Adams (I think). Those mountains are amazing! If I am lucky I can catch a glimpse of Mt. Jefferson on my morning commute to Salem but not always. Mt. Jefferson is so much further away it seem. Right here in Portland, Mt. Hood is practically starring you in the face. It’s amazing I must say.