The widow who gave her last “two very small copper coins”, perhaps the last she had, gave in faith that God could use it (Mark 12:42). That story has always stuck with me. In college and just after college, money was tight. I remember pulling the last few dollars out of my purse and hoping and praying that God would use it.
Although I’m not in that situation now, I compare it somewhat to how I feel about the situation we are in with the pandemic. I may work for a local government entity but I am not an “essential worker”. I may help with finances at church but I am not leading a small group or a whole church or on the ground providing “hands on” ministry. I am not leaping into the fire or running into the burning building. I am doing what I need to do to get by but most days it doesn’t feel like enough. I’ve prayed, what is God calling me to do? Be a mother? Be a supportive wife? Participate when called on? What can I give? Why during this emergency do I feel inadequate and somewhat unwilling to jump up?
Then it dawned on me – I can give! I have the ability to give financially in faith that God can use it! God can use whatever we can put forward. There are people who are physically fighting and reaching out to those in need who need our financial support. If you can’t physically go, or mentally go, then maybe you can give and help support those who are doing the work. Let’s keep them employed and doing the work we may not be called to do right now.
I don’t know about you but I am a worrier. Yep, you read that right – worry-er not warrior. I’m a planner who is way out of her league right now during this pandemic. Every day brings new challenges and new worries. But one thing that is constant and never changes is the love of God. God is always there and will always provide for me. I take refuge in that.
I read Matthew 6:34 tonight and it stuck with me as it reads, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
I think it was the last sentence that made me pause. Last night I felt anxious, like I couldn’t sit still. I was fidgety and my mind would not slow down (and it wasn’t caffeine overload!). I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep. It wasn’t anything specific but just the general anxiety of our situation right now. Turn on the news, Facebook, emails…it’s everywhere. But as I laid down to sleep, with the help of a backrub from my husband, I realized that once I fell asleep, the worries of the day would fade away. Tomorrow would be a new day (even if it were filled with more anxiety) with a fresh start. I am thankful for this verse that reminds us that we can start fresh every morning. Let go and give it up to God to fight the fight – that’s already been won! We (I) worry over nothing. Right now I can’t plan (really anything!) my day but it’s okay. God’s got this.
So tonight I will fall asleep, not worrying about tomorrow but praying that God will help me fire all those synapses and seize the day! Instead of worrying, I want to make the most of this situation and find the answers to our problems, no matter how small or large they may be. God, make me a warrior not a worrier. It’s time to put me in, Coach.